I've taken a bold step in my subconscious. He used to be the first thought I had every morning and the last thought I had every night. He still is, except it isn't thoughts of love and fondness and memories anymore. It's thoughts of him with her, and how angry I am at him. No. Not at him, at his choices. I must be much more angry at that now that I've got some space to clear my head. That and his actions.
Why do we get so angry with people we love when they disappoint us? I mean, if we really love them, we shouldn't want to control their actions, nor should we want them to be anything but happy. And if being with someone else makes them happy, then we need to step aside and walk away.
Which is what I have done with several men in my life that say they love me.
Curious, isn't it? The word love. It can mean so many different things to us. And we might say it all the time, but it means a different kind of love or different intensity to everyone we say it to. No love is exactly the same. You always love someone the most, and that's the person you choose to spend your life with. Not your children. Not your best friends. Now you can argue all you want about loving more than one person, but I will argue back that there is still the one you love the most. And that is the one you choose.
Remember, you are always doing exactly what you want with your life. Or you'd change it. Some of us are martyrs, some of us enjoy the pain and some of us are only happy with conflict because that's how we grew up. Abused, or surrounded by arguing adults that called their marriage love. Children get confused and end up choosing what they see. Almost every time. Its very difficult to break the pattern of what mommy and daddy show us. For example, I broke my abuse pattern and didn't abuse my children sexually. I believe that was easy for me because it wasn't a parent that abused me, but family members. But I was not able to break the broken home pattern that my mother showed me with her life. It felt normal to me to have conflict and be the only parent. It was what I knew. I wasn't happy unless there was some kind of drama.
Of course that was the past, now I am completely happy without drama, because I've taken the time to force myself to be alone to heal. To understand what real happiness is. To learn to be truly content with my own company and not need anyone else to 'complete' me. For I am complete. I am me.
What I thought I wanted was to love Mr. Practical, and have him be the companion in my life, and be one to him. With time, his choice has proven the right one for me. Ironic, isn't it? That I'm happier without him than he is with her and his life choices? Then it became Mr. Hopeful that came back into my life and his needs overshadowed my own. Once again I tried to be someone I wasn't because I loved him. And I wanted him to be happy. He gave me every reason to believe he wasn't. Except changing his life. They both did. Both are still very unhappy with parts of their lives. Major parts. Parts that with me would be different. But I'm not worth choosing. Not to them. And while somehow along the way I learned to separate the love of friendship with the love of passionate partners, I can be friends with them both. But they have to want this too.
So I wait to see what they will choose. I don't wait alone, nor do I wait wasting my days anymore hoping they will contact me. Nor have I done that very unhealthy habit of waiting, since I moved to Chicago. But I have to admit that when they do, I am happy that our friendship remains.
My issue now is conquering this anger. And not letting it burst out upon anyone. Even the ones I feel deserve it. Happily I can admit that I'm not angry at Mr. Charisma any longer. I don't hate him. I don't think of him at all. Its an after thought that I even mention him here. Only as a measuring device. At least with Mr. Practical and Mr. Hopeful I still care enough to be angry or worried or happy. And I must admit that I'm not angry at Mr. Practical, worried is more the correct term there. But Mr. Hopeful, I thought was a stronger man than he has showed me. And so perhaps I'm angry at myself for not seeing him as who he has become, with time, and the curve balls that life has thrown him. I'm much more adaptable and when life throws me curve balls I not only hit them out of the park, but once I'm safe at home, I prepare for the next one.
Cheers
Sunday, October 18, 2015
Sunday, October 11, 2015
Angry - The Eighth Dwarf
I'm frustrated. I'm at a loss for words. I'm angry. I hate Angry. Angry doesn't let me think straight. Angry speeds along with thoughts that no human mouth could articulate. I'm one of the lucky ones, I have both types of Angry. (I think I just created a new dwarf - Angry)
I have the type of Angry that throws things across the room, lets call him Rage. Last time I did that was when I was 34. Rage seems to be sleeping. But I also have the type that is very quiet and very patient, lets call him Revenge. That's the part to be afraid of. That's the angry that if allowed to grow I will reap a bitter harvest.
Fortunately I know this, so it's highly unlikely that I'll let it gain control over me. But if I did. It's the kind of anger that destroys relationships and explodes an already dangerous situation. Revenge is never the way to go. I know, I've let it gain control in the past, and told myself it was for their own good. (insert insane evil laughter here) But true evil never sees they are evil, they always believe they are doing good. That they are saving someone, or its for the greater good. That's evil I can understand. Because I've felt it. Felt that I knew better, in all my wisdom. What a crock of shit.
How can anyone else know whats best for you? HOW?
Only you can say how you feel. Only you can know when you are Happy. Or Grumpy. Or any of the other dwarfs. But let someone in. Let someone love you and all of a sudden, POW. They know. They know what's best for you. They try to change you into what they want you to be, instead of loving who they met. Who you are. Ever been there? I have. I thought I was done picking that guy after all my marriages, but Mr. Charisma slunk and slithered his way in. (insert more evil laughter) And he was just suppose to be fun. Just suppose to keep me busy until Mr. Hopeful found his way to me. Well. I'm angry. I've given up on Mr. Hopeful ever finding his way to me. And that's good. That's been a long time coming. A VERY LONG TIME. But as I've always tried to explain, the heart wants what the heart wants. It's not very bright. The heart. The heart could be Dopey, and sometimes Bashful. Because the heart loves unconditionally.
That stupid organ! When will it learn. But that's the brain. That's Doc. Saying what you know you don't want to know, but you know it already. Like, if he loves you he'd be with you. GOD I hate Doc. Even if he's right. So today I give power to the new eighth dwarf Angry, and I'm going to let him go out into the world and just be free, like a butterfly. Because I'm getting over what I believe now to have been the flu, since I'm on day 22 (with 6 well days in there somewhere) So I'm going to lay back and be Sleepy and Sneezy while I watch Doctor Who, The Walking Dead, Dark Matter, and Rita.
Cheers
I have the type of Angry that throws things across the room, lets call him Rage. Last time I did that was when I was 34. Rage seems to be sleeping. But I also have the type that is very quiet and very patient, lets call him Revenge. That's the part to be afraid of. That's the angry that if allowed to grow I will reap a bitter harvest.
Fortunately I know this, so it's highly unlikely that I'll let it gain control over me. But if I did. It's the kind of anger that destroys relationships and explodes an already dangerous situation. Revenge is never the way to go. I know, I've let it gain control in the past, and told myself it was for their own good. (insert insane evil laughter here) But true evil never sees they are evil, they always believe they are doing good. That they are saving someone, or its for the greater good. That's evil I can understand. Because I've felt it. Felt that I knew better, in all my wisdom. What a crock of shit.
How can anyone else know whats best for you? HOW?
Only you can say how you feel. Only you can know when you are Happy. Or Grumpy. Or any of the other dwarfs. But let someone in. Let someone love you and all of a sudden, POW. They know. They know what's best for you. They try to change you into what they want you to be, instead of loving who they met. Who you are. Ever been there? I have. I thought I was done picking that guy after all my marriages, but Mr. Charisma slunk and slithered his way in. (insert more evil laughter) And he was just suppose to be fun. Just suppose to keep me busy until Mr. Hopeful found his way to me. Well. I'm angry. I've given up on Mr. Hopeful ever finding his way to me. And that's good. That's been a long time coming. A VERY LONG TIME. But as I've always tried to explain, the heart wants what the heart wants. It's not very bright. The heart. The heart could be Dopey, and sometimes Bashful. Because the heart loves unconditionally.
That stupid organ! When will it learn. But that's the brain. That's Doc. Saying what you know you don't want to know, but you know it already. Like, if he loves you he'd be with you. GOD I hate Doc. Even if he's right. So today I give power to the new eighth dwarf Angry, and I'm going to let him go out into the world and just be free, like a butterfly. Because I'm getting over what I believe now to have been the flu, since I'm on day 22 (with 6 well days in there somewhere) So I'm going to lay back and be Sleepy and Sneezy while I watch Doctor Who, The Walking Dead, Dark Matter, and Rita.
Cheers
Sunday, October 4, 2015
Can of Worms OPENED. Perception of GUNS
We all see things differently. This is a scientific fact, our brains process what we see differently. So it follows that through that process what we feel is different and governed by what we have processed. But what helps us make those connections in our brains? Our experience. And all of our experience is different. I believe, for the most part, as humans, we can agree on this. But that is where it unfortunately ends, and why we have so many conflicts in our day to day life with other humans on almost every subject. When we stand up for our rights, or our feelings are in question on a topic, we can forget that we feel this way only because of OUR PERSONAL experience.
But what about the other guy? That's right, that other guy spouting complete nonsense about religion, or sex or politics. What about that guys opinion? His experience. His perception. Doesn't it count? Even if its contrary to our own? Of course it does. That's why, we, at our best discuss, or argue and sometimes at our worse, we rage. And unfortunately when we rage, sometimes, we take our opinions to the point of life or death. At the end of a gun in a crowded school room, or military base, or shopping mall, or airplane. We have started to believe that if we can't change your mind about your opinion well, then we'll just kill you. This is a violence that is obviously brought about by extreme negative perceptions and I would imagine great despair and depression. A feeling of helplessness and in some cases a feeling of overwhelming power. Power to change the world, perhaps to their perception of a better place. This is wrong of course, and we are helpless as we watch these unbalanced and perhaps temporarily lost individuals, grapple with their minds as they slowly go insane. For what sane person could be on the end of that gun, trying to force their perceptions upon others. Their feelings of right and wrong, or their rage. What sane person would use a gun in this manner? None would. And yet, somehow, this unbalanced and desperate person, has acquired such a means of destruction. And in most states this is accomplished quite easily, and with little checking of proper identification. How can we regulate gun control if there is no real gun control? I don't want to ban guns. I believe that if you feel you need one to hunt or protect your family you should be able to have one, if properly trained in how to use it, keep it clean, and truly guard the right to have it. By keeping it away from the untrained, like children, or the unbalanced. And I believe that most of us that own guns do just this. But that can't be the whole story.
Because there are still those out there, with guns, that don't care, or have given up on life. They might just take themselves out, but they might decide that you cutting them off during rush hour traffic, is enough of a difference in perception to end your life. Or they might decide that if you don't believe in the same god as they do that you are evil and should die. Or they might decide that because you made fun of their way of dress or sexual partner that the world would be better off without you.
When people try to discuss this topic of "how do we stop all the mass murder in our country", there is a lot of heat. And the gun owners immediately think that we want to take away their rights and change the constitution. Well, that's not true, not completely. We do need to change the constitution on this issue, just like we changed it for women to vote, for anyone of any color or religion to vote, even for young people aged 18 to vote, and also for the limitation of the presidential term of office. In the last 200 years our constitution has been amended 27 times. Its a 'living document' designed to live and grown as our nation grows. When people argue that we want to change it. Its true we do. But it needs to be changed so more innocent people with a different perception, don't have to die, because of one persons rage. Because of one persons perception. I'm all for the discussion of that perception, I'll listen and even try to change my mind before I try to change yours. But I don't feel I should have to do this at the end of a gun. Nor would I ever use a gun to bring my perception to the table. But so far, I'm still sane.
What about that other guy?
Isn't it worth it to make it more difficult to obtain a gun to keep our children and families safe?
Isn't that what guarding the privilege of having a gun is about?
I don't understand why this is even an issue. It's a no brainer to me. Less guns on the street less gun deaths. Less mass shootings from quite frankly, insane people. Not one of the shooters was pronounced sane. No one said, "oh that guy was just trying to make a really good point and when no one listened he just shot them all." They were all insane. They had all cracked. Had enough. And had access to guns. Access. This is all I want to limit.
Can we just, as humans, sit down without the NRA, and talk about this? Can we just get the lobbies to for once stay out of it, and let us decide as humans? This is why congress can't get anything done. Lobbies. It's either the NRA or the Big Three or Big Oil....it's always something that bars our elected officials from passing the laws that I hope we want.
If my nation of fellow American's do not want what is really best for humans, I'm afraid I'll have to leave the nation of my birth for a country that believes that life is more important than money. Please feel free to comment as always, but I beg you to think. Just think and feel, as a human with a limited life span and great power over the earth.
Cheers
But what about the other guy? That's right, that other guy spouting complete nonsense about religion, or sex or politics. What about that guys opinion? His experience. His perception. Doesn't it count? Even if its contrary to our own? Of course it does. That's why, we, at our best discuss, or argue and sometimes at our worse, we rage. And unfortunately when we rage, sometimes, we take our opinions to the point of life or death. At the end of a gun in a crowded school room, or military base, or shopping mall, or airplane. We have started to believe that if we can't change your mind about your opinion well, then we'll just kill you. This is a violence that is obviously brought about by extreme negative perceptions and I would imagine great despair and depression. A feeling of helplessness and in some cases a feeling of overwhelming power. Power to change the world, perhaps to their perception of a better place. This is wrong of course, and we are helpless as we watch these unbalanced and perhaps temporarily lost individuals, grapple with their minds as they slowly go insane. For what sane person could be on the end of that gun, trying to force their perceptions upon others. Their feelings of right and wrong, or their rage. What sane person would use a gun in this manner? None would. And yet, somehow, this unbalanced and desperate person, has acquired such a means of destruction. And in most states this is accomplished quite easily, and with little checking of proper identification. How can we regulate gun control if there is no real gun control? I don't want to ban guns. I believe that if you feel you need one to hunt or protect your family you should be able to have one, if properly trained in how to use it, keep it clean, and truly guard the right to have it. By keeping it away from the untrained, like children, or the unbalanced. And I believe that most of us that own guns do just this. But that can't be the whole story.
Because there are still those out there, with guns, that don't care, or have given up on life. They might just take themselves out, but they might decide that you cutting them off during rush hour traffic, is enough of a difference in perception to end your life. Or they might decide that if you don't believe in the same god as they do that you are evil and should die. Or they might decide that because you made fun of their way of dress or sexual partner that the world would be better off without you.
When people try to discuss this topic of "how do we stop all the mass murder in our country", there is a lot of heat. And the gun owners immediately think that we want to take away their rights and change the constitution. Well, that's not true, not completely. We do need to change the constitution on this issue, just like we changed it for women to vote, for anyone of any color or religion to vote, even for young people aged 18 to vote, and also for the limitation of the presidential term of office. In the last 200 years our constitution has been amended 27 times. Its a 'living document' designed to live and grown as our nation grows. When people argue that we want to change it. Its true we do. But it needs to be changed so more innocent people with a different perception, don't have to die, because of one persons rage. Because of one persons perception. I'm all for the discussion of that perception, I'll listen and even try to change my mind before I try to change yours. But I don't feel I should have to do this at the end of a gun. Nor would I ever use a gun to bring my perception to the table. But so far, I'm still sane.
What about that other guy?
Isn't it worth it to make it more difficult to obtain a gun to keep our children and families safe?
Isn't that what guarding the privilege of having a gun is about?
I don't understand why this is even an issue. It's a no brainer to me. Less guns on the street less gun deaths. Less mass shootings from quite frankly, insane people. Not one of the shooters was pronounced sane. No one said, "oh that guy was just trying to make a really good point and when no one listened he just shot them all." They were all insane. They had all cracked. Had enough. And had access to guns. Access. This is all I want to limit.
Can we just, as humans, sit down without the NRA, and talk about this? Can we just get the lobbies to for once stay out of it, and let us decide as humans? This is why congress can't get anything done. Lobbies. It's either the NRA or the Big Three or Big Oil....it's always something that bars our elected officials from passing the laws that I hope we want.
If my nation of fellow American's do not want what is really best for humans, I'm afraid I'll have to leave the nation of my birth for a country that believes that life is more important than money. Please feel free to comment as always, but I beg you to think. Just think and feel, as a human with a limited life span and great power over the earth.
Cheers
Sunday, September 27, 2015
Test For Echo Part Two
Day eight! I hate the common cold. It's almost everything the flu is without being flat on your back. But by the end of the day, you feel like you need to be flat on your back. Its a rainy and cloudy day in Chicago this morning, and I was so hoping it would be clear for the harvest moon, lunar eclipse tonight. Hopefully this will clear up by then. One of the best things about all this technology we have is someone will get great pictures of it and post them tomorrow. Maybe even without Photoshop.
One of the worst things is that we are all becoming much more physically alone while we amass more and more electronic relationships. Without all this technology I wouldn't be able to stay in touch with all my loved ones and friends that I hold dear, but sometimes, I wish it wasn't so easy to stay in touch. I miss that random phone call from friends wanting to just hang out and be together talking, or in today's vernacular 'chat'. The internet and social media has replaced the evening dropping by of friends, just to be social. Just to keep in touch and see what's new. It has made it much too easy to have two lives or three, or more.
Having it all. A life you live every day with your favorite people. Sometimes those are your family and sometimes not. And then the others in your life on the internet. The ones that came in a close second when you were picking and choosing where you would live. Now some of these people are just as important as the ones around you. In my case, most of my internet contact are more important than the people I see daily, but that's not true of many of you. Some are the lives you wish you could have chosen. The ones that got away. The safety nets. This reality is a sad statement on how we are evolving.
Before the internet, where we can store our secret lives and people we wish we could be near, we had to make actual life choices. Choices that took you down a road where you knew you'd never see or talk to that person again. And I think, then, the choices we made were more honest. Certainly more final. Some of those roads I walked away from have found me again in the world wide web. And it's interesting to see how their lives unfolded without me by their sides, as I once was. Its also very reassuring to reconnect with lost loves and old friend and see that the real reason you liked each other in the first place is still there. Of course there is a down side to this too, some of the ones that have found me are not the same, or didn't grow in the right direction for me to feel that connection still. They are either too bitter and cynical or just don't have the same political, religious, or sexual ideas that we shared in the past. Such is life. We grow and change and once we've taught all we can to another soul we move on. It's why some of your friends change throughout your life. You are still teaching and learning.
But then there are some friends that come and they just wont leave! EVER! These are the ones that really know you and the ones you continue to learn from and grow together. The ones that stand by you no matter how depressing you get about yourself; they are there to lift you up as you are when they start to doubt life and change. These are ones that know your life, that check in weekly or daily or whenever life gives them a chance. The ones that would pop in if the internet weren't around. The ones that would have chosen you to be near. If they could. The ones that know, life would not be the same without you in it. These are the ones, you need to keep in your life. Not just because you need them but, pay attention now this is the important part, THEY NEED YOU. That's right. Internet relationships are just as real and carry just as much of our hearts and minds as the ones who we can reach out and touch. Its how we are evolving, and changing. And there's no stopping it now.
Cheers
One of the worst things is that we are all becoming much more physically alone while we amass more and more electronic relationships. Without all this technology I wouldn't be able to stay in touch with all my loved ones and friends that I hold dear, but sometimes, I wish it wasn't so easy to stay in touch. I miss that random phone call from friends wanting to just hang out and be together talking, or in today's vernacular 'chat'. The internet and social media has replaced the evening dropping by of friends, just to be social. Just to keep in touch and see what's new. It has made it much too easy to have two lives or three, or more.
Having it all. A life you live every day with your favorite people. Sometimes those are your family and sometimes not. And then the others in your life on the internet. The ones that came in a close second when you were picking and choosing where you would live. Now some of these people are just as important as the ones around you. In my case, most of my internet contact are more important than the people I see daily, but that's not true of many of you. Some are the lives you wish you could have chosen. The ones that got away. The safety nets. This reality is a sad statement on how we are evolving.
Before the internet, where we can store our secret lives and people we wish we could be near, we had to make actual life choices. Choices that took you down a road where you knew you'd never see or talk to that person again. And I think, then, the choices we made were more honest. Certainly more final. Some of those roads I walked away from have found me again in the world wide web. And it's interesting to see how their lives unfolded without me by their sides, as I once was. Its also very reassuring to reconnect with lost loves and old friend and see that the real reason you liked each other in the first place is still there. Of course there is a down side to this too, some of the ones that have found me are not the same, or didn't grow in the right direction for me to feel that connection still. They are either too bitter and cynical or just don't have the same political, religious, or sexual ideas that we shared in the past. Such is life. We grow and change and once we've taught all we can to another soul we move on. It's why some of your friends change throughout your life. You are still teaching and learning.
But then there are some friends that come and they just wont leave! EVER! These are the ones that really know you and the ones you continue to learn from and grow together. The ones that stand by you no matter how depressing you get about yourself; they are there to lift you up as you are when they start to doubt life and change. These are ones that know your life, that check in weekly or daily or whenever life gives them a chance. The ones that would pop in if the internet weren't around. The ones that would have chosen you to be near. If they could. The ones that know, life would not be the same without you in it. These are the ones, you need to keep in your life. Not just because you need them but, pay attention now this is the important part, THEY NEED YOU. That's right. Internet relationships are just as real and carry just as much of our hearts and minds as the ones who we can reach out and touch. Its how we are evolving, and changing. And there's no stopping it now.
Cheers
Sunday, September 20, 2015
Too Sick To Write
What a great time with Ginger Snap yesterday and Friday night. He came over to spend the night with his grandma, and we ate junk food and started construction on the Lego Death Star. We stayed up until 10:30, which is the equivilant of an all nighter for a seven year old, and worked on it again all day Saturday until it was time to go to his house, and watch him and his little brother for a few hours so Second Daughter and Second Son could have some adult time at a wedding. All in all it was a great weekend until, while on my way home from their house, I started to have a scratchy throat and couldn't stop sneezing.
You guessed it. So sick this morning. I hope I can kick it before work tomorrow. I need groceries and should do laundry, although if that had to wait a day it could, but food cannot. Maybe I can have them delivered. We shall check the funding and see. :)
I should edit Act Two but I think in this state it wouldn't be worth keeping, but I might still attempt it if I can't sleep. I was having so much fun or so busy the last few days that I missed Mr. Hopeful three separate times that he tried to reach out to me. Well two for sure and one I almost missed but he couldn't really talk at our usual weekly time anyway this week. But it made me feel good to know I was in his thoughts and that he tried again. It made me feel good to be busy too, though. I think, sometimes, that a great deal of my social life is waiting to chat with him.
I really wish I felt better. I also wish I had access to BBC for new Doctor Who. Makes being sick worse somehow knowing I have to wait a year for it to get to Netflix. Where are the fan boy links when you need them. The SAFE ones. LOL
Cheers
You guessed it. So sick this morning. I hope I can kick it before work tomorrow. I need groceries and should do laundry, although if that had to wait a day it could, but food cannot. Maybe I can have them delivered. We shall check the funding and see. :)
I should edit Act Two but I think in this state it wouldn't be worth keeping, but I might still attempt it if I can't sleep. I was having so much fun or so busy the last few days that I missed Mr. Hopeful three separate times that he tried to reach out to me. Well two for sure and one I almost missed but he couldn't really talk at our usual weekly time anyway this week. But it made me feel good to know I was in his thoughts and that he tried again. It made me feel good to be busy too, though. I think, sometimes, that a great deal of my social life is waiting to chat with him.
I really wish I felt better. I also wish I had access to BBC for new Doctor Who. Makes being sick worse somehow knowing I have to wait a year for it to get to Netflix. Where are the fan boy links when you need them. The SAFE ones. LOL
Cheers
Sunday, September 13, 2015
Wonder Woman's 40th Surprise Party
The first draft of the play is finished. And yesterday was spent formatting and editing the first act. And I must say that I'm pretty pleased with my ability not only to write the damn thing in two weeks, which was my goal. But set enough fires under Mr. Practical and Poet In My Heart to get them to read it and get the feed back I needed to make that goal. I couldn't have finished that fast without them. Today after uploading pictures from last nights surprise party for Wonder Woman, I will attack the second act.
The surprise party was a mixture of old school rock, and all things about her. Things that reminded us of her. So we dressed up as comic book, and Dr. Who characters and things that she does or is. One friend came as a mime and another as a reporter and a third as a zoo representative with the new otter, all things that she loves. There were a couple of doctors to keep my River Song entertained. And a very creative Poseidon and Dionysus, a Clark Kent, and Buffy although she must have done her job well, no vampires that we could see, and several cut out masks from mostly Dr. Who and the Princess Bride for people to hold. So there ended up being several Doctors, a weeping angle, Amy Pond, well you get the idea. The room was decorated with large paper drawing of the Fire Swamp with a danger R.O.U.S's this way, and a cardboard TARDIS which we all got pictures of ourselves in front of with the birthday girl before we left. I was greedy and had a friend take some pictures of me before the party really got going, Just to be sure I got some. I think I took more pictures than anyone else. Go figure. But I hope at least all the birthday shots get posted. There were some good ones of us all.
She was very surprised by all of us gathering for her 40th, but the real surprise came when we had her open her present. We all pitched in on it but it was made by Second Daughter who couldn't make the party and she did a wonderful job. Especially since she couldn't have her come over for fittings. Her eyes nearly popped out of her head at the complete Wonder Woman costume she was holding. She had mentioned to her boy friend that she's always wanted one. And he not only made that happen but the party of her best friends as well. I was so happy to be included. The actress who played Bette Milder said to me as I left, "You had a good time? See you made so many friends all by your ownself. You're all grown up." She was referring to how nervous I told her I was to be at an event with all of Second Daughter's friends without her. It was a genuine remark and one I cherished coming from her. She happens to be one of the writers who agreed to read my play. And I didn't even have to ask her about it. She came to me and said, " I saw on the 'internets' that you finished. I can't wait to read it. How cool was that to remember on her special night. One of the other writers was there early helping to set up, and while he didn't mention anything to me, I did to him and he was impressed I finished but didn't remind me he'd read it. I think I'll have Wonder Woman read it first.
Better get these birthday pictures posted.
Cheer
The surprise party was a mixture of old school rock, and all things about her. Things that reminded us of her. So we dressed up as comic book, and Dr. Who characters and things that she does or is. One friend came as a mime and another as a reporter and a third as a zoo representative with the new otter, all things that she loves. There were a couple of doctors to keep my River Song entertained. And a very creative Poseidon and Dionysus, a Clark Kent, and Buffy although she must have done her job well, no vampires that we could see, and several cut out masks from mostly Dr. Who and the Princess Bride for people to hold. So there ended up being several Doctors, a weeping angle, Amy Pond, well you get the idea. The room was decorated with large paper drawing of the Fire Swamp with a danger R.O.U.S's this way, and a cardboard TARDIS which we all got pictures of ourselves in front of with the birthday girl before we left. I was greedy and had a friend take some pictures of me before the party really got going, Just to be sure I got some. I think I took more pictures than anyone else. Go figure. But I hope at least all the birthday shots get posted. There were some good ones of us all.
She was very surprised by all of us gathering for her 40th, but the real surprise came when we had her open her present. We all pitched in on it but it was made by Second Daughter who couldn't make the party and she did a wonderful job. Especially since she couldn't have her come over for fittings. Her eyes nearly popped out of her head at the complete Wonder Woman costume she was holding. She had mentioned to her boy friend that she's always wanted one. And he not only made that happen but the party of her best friends as well. I was so happy to be included. The actress who played Bette Milder said to me as I left, "You had a good time? See you made so many friends all by your ownself. You're all grown up." She was referring to how nervous I told her I was to be at an event with all of Second Daughter's friends without her. It was a genuine remark and one I cherished coming from her. She happens to be one of the writers who agreed to read my play. And I didn't even have to ask her about it. She came to me and said, " I saw on the 'internets' that you finished. I can't wait to read it. How cool was that to remember on her special night. One of the other writers was there early helping to set up, and while he didn't mention anything to me, I did to him and he was impressed I finished but didn't remind me he'd read it. I think I'll have Wonder Woman read it first.
Better get these birthday pictures posted.
Cheer
Sunday, September 6, 2015
Surprise!
I love surprises. Well, the good ones. And this one came at the perfect time. I had been feeling kind of down and forgotten during my vacation. Mostly because an old friend of mine was in town but couldn't make the time to see me. That kind of thing always hurts, but it couldn't be helped. But then a surprise...
The first surprise this holiday weekend, was finally getting to see Ginger Snap and Sammy Bo Baggins on Friday night. Second Daughter and I took them for ice cream and I finally got to catch up on Ginger Snap's summer away. My surprise was that he was kind of bored waiting around for his dad to make some time to see him. (his reason for being there, but anyway) He decided he would allow himself to start watching Doctor Who. All by himself from my example as his nanny and grandma. I'm glad he took something of me with him, and if it was the summer of Doctor Who, well I can think of a lot worse things a young boy could do with a summer being watched by his grandparents.
The second surprise was I finished Act One of the play I'm writing. Well, I should say the first draft of it. But it's got a life of it's own now and is half way done. So after I sent it off to The Poet In My Heart to get her ok, I took myself out to a surprise brunch. Just on the spur of the moment. And it was nice. Feeling accomplished I went back home and had my pretty typical vacation day. Gaming. Writing. Watching Dr. Who. Just hanging out with myself and sometimes catching an episode with Mr. Practical long distance. Its been a very quiet vacation.
The third surprise was out of the blue, Benny Sweat of the Sweat Boys was in town on Sweat Boys secret business, and last night as I was finishing watching the tear jerking season two ending of Dr. Who, (Doomsday...poor Rose and the Doctor) he texted me and wanted to meet me for a drink. He had told me he was going to be in town and if he had time he would look me up. Right. We all know how that usually works. Like all other friends I've had visit my city in the last year for comic con or concerts or vacations, and never call or show up for that drink. But not Benny Sweat. He called, and I convinced him to come to me and see my favorite English Pub. It's not a showy bar, nor is it loud. And it was perfect, he said it was just what he needed after all the exhausting but exciting business trip. And it was great to catch up to him with The Blues Brothers and Animal House playing in the background to the regulars on the television. The music last night was the sound tracks for these shows instead of their normal jazz and I was glad he enjoyed himself at my favorite bar. Catching up with Benny about our shared good news and successes was just what The Doctor ordered for me; and while my weekly conversation with Mr. Hopeful cheered me up and started to set my mind straight from its negative narration, by reminding me how much I am missed and not forgotten; catching up in the flesh with an old friend was healing on the level I needed. And this old friend is kind of a perfect one to see my new place first and my favorite bar. Because he crosses over into many of my little clicks of friends. He leaves town tomorrow, and I know I wont see him again this visit, but I hope to see him and his wife the next time my city calls.
Cheers
The first surprise this holiday weekend, was finally getting to see Ginger Snap and Sammy Bo Baggins on Friday night. Second Daughter and I took them for ice cream and I finally got to catch up on Ginger Snap's summer away. My surprise was that he was kind of bored waiting around for his dad to make some time to see him. (his reason for being there, but anyway) He decided he would allow himself to start watching Doctor Who. All by himself from my example as his nanny and grandma. I'm glad he took something of me with him, and if it was the summer of Doctor Who, well I can think of a lot worse things a young boy could do with a summer being watched by his grandparents.
The second surprise was I finished Act One of the play I'm writing. Well, I should say the first draft of it. But it's got a life of it's own now and is half way done. So after I sent it off to The Poet In My Heart to get her ok, I took myself out to a surprise brunch. Just on the spur of the moment. And it was nice. Feeling accomplished I went back home and had my pretty typical vacation day. Gaming. Writing. Watching Dr. Who. Just hanging out with myself and sometimes catching an episode with Mr. Practical long distance. Its been a very quiet vacation.
The third surprise was out of the blue, Benny Sweat of the Sweat Boys was in town on Sweat Boys secret business, and last night as I was finishing watching the tear jerking season two ending of Dr. Who, (Doomsday...poor Rose and the Doctor) he texted me and wanted to meet me for a drink. He had told me he was going to be in town and if he had time he would look me up. Right. We all know how that usually works. Like all other friends I've had visit my city in the last year for comic con or concerts or vacations, and never call or show up for that drink. But not Benny Sweat. He called, and I convinced him to come to me and see my favorite English Pub. It's not a showy bar, nor is it loud. And it was perfect, he said it was just what he needed after all the exhausting but exciting business trip. And it was great to catch up to him with The Blues Brothers and Animal House playing in the background to the regulars on the television. The music last night was the sound tracks for these shows instead of their normal jazz and I was glad he enjoyed himself at my favorite bar. Catching up with Benny about our shared good news and successes was just what The Doctor ordered for me; and while my weekly conversation with Mr. Hopeful cheered me up and started to set my mind straight from its negative narration, by reminding me how much I am missed and not forgotten; catching up in the flesh with an old friend was healing on the level I needed. And this old friend is kind of a perfect one to see my new place first and my favorite bar. Because he crosses over into many of my little clicks of friends. He leaves town tomorrow, and I know I wont see him again this visit, but I hope to see him and his wife the next time my city calls.
Cheers
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