Sunday, April 3, 2016

Spring Visions *Reference*

Maybe it's Spring, somethings in the air.  Or maybe it's just time.  I don't know.  But it seems that a lot of strange things are occurring out there and the weather is only one.  Perhaps our emotions are more tied with the seasonal changes than we are willing to admit, or remember.  Perhaps this is how we always come alive, in Spring.  After a long winter of hibernation from the elements with the food, we managed to hunt, preserve or grow.  Perhaps this is just the residual strong instinct of move, be productive, or die next winter.  But for me, it is an almost overpowering urge to make things happen, explore, create, and move forward. 

Personally, I feel fine and in tune with not only nature but my place in the world.  I'm not incredibly happy or sad.  I feel very comfortably content with my life and yet even with that I can't help but feel that something is on the move.  Something is on the edge of the horizon that I can't see, that I can barely make out.  But it's coming. 

I hope it's good.  Whatever it is it's still too far away to make out anything except a gray landscape and a dark shape approaching.  It's rectangular and low to the ground, like the beginnings of a step seen from the side.  And when I try to focus on it, it shifts and vibrates, becoming more alter shaped.  This is the curious part to me, and the part that it starts to feel bad.  As if I'm trying to force it somehow, so I back off.  The whole vision feels off and therefore why I'm curious and keep poking at it.  Mentally.  Whenever I've had this feeling  before it has heralded a great change in my personal life.   Sometimes a move, or change of my circle of friends, divorce.  But it was always change.  With that being said,  I don't think this has as much to do with me as it will effect me.  So I'm paying close attention to all my friends problems.  Now more than before the vision.  Because something is coming, and the more I try to focus on it the further away it wants to jump.  When I try to focus on it, it feels like something bad, but when it jumps I feel completely neutral. 

Either I'm getting better at accepting this gift and trusting it rather than worry about something I can't change, or it's not that bad.  Maybe only appears bad at first.  You know I've heard it said that if we're lost we sometimes have to lose everything we have in order to get everything we need.  And while that sounds harsh, my personal experience can tell you it's very true.  So even if this 'thing' whatever it is, turns out to be bad, what we have to remember is that it had to happen to give us what we want in our lives.  I feel like this has already happened to me, back in, 1985, 1994, and 2013.  So I am rather curious about this vision and I keep poking at it but can never see more.  Who I should warn.  Who's life is going to change, without warning, and suddenly. 

I'm documenting this here in my blog this morning mostly for my own personal reference.  But if my words ring true to any of you perhaps, you know more than I.