Sunday, May 12, 2013

Happy Mother's Day! or Happy Hallmark Holiday!

This is a hallmark holiday.  And normally I'm really against them. Valentine's Day, Grandparents Day, Father's Day, Sibling Day, (I'd list some of the religious ones too, but some of you might choke on your coffee).  I hate the fact that some people really are sad on Mothers/Fathers Day because they so want children and for whatever reason can't have them.  Or on Valentines Day when they are single, and the actual reminder of the day makes them feel more alone than necessary.  While I appreciate being spoiled on Mother's Day, and am very thankful for my wonderful children for remembering me last night and today, and plans tonight.  To me, it is just another day.  While I think it's great to be remembered, as a mom, on Mother's Day, I think that when your family is truly loving and not dysfunctional, you will be remembered on more than a hallmark holiday.  It's almost like having two birthdays a year, being a mom in this culture.  And I have to admit, my birthday is MUCH more important to me than Mother's Day.  And for the same reasons,  my kids and loved ones spoil me on my birthday, just like today.  

With that also comes the sadness for those of us whose mom's are no longer myself....and again, I have to admit that while I loved my mother greatly and her absence is still felt 14 years after her death; I remember her more on her birthday than today.  I often wish she were still alive to yell at me or hug me or both.  To share my life with and tap into her wisdom.  A wisdom that most of us don't realize is deep and loving until it is ripped away from us by Death.  Sometimes Death really pisses me off.

So if your mom is still living, please call her today, or pop in and see her, or whatever you have planned.  But don't stop there....don't  just think of her today, and her birthday, because no matter how busy you are, believe me, that is noticed.  Remember, life is short, and Death rarely takes a holiday.  And you never know what Fate is planning, so no matter how much time you think you have, you never have enough.

Happy Mother's Day to all the moms out there that I know and love, and to my mom who I feel near me all the time, and miss more than I can articulate....still.